There is a very fine line when ignoring someone you love. Perhaps you’re doing it to get over an ex and ignoring them is the only way to do so.
Or maybe you keep arguing over the same thing and you just need space.
You do not want to be so cruel that you ruin the relationship, but you want to make your point known. Plus, you would want to stand your ground.
There are many reasons you might choose to ignore someone you love, whether it be because they have hurt you and you need some space or you are trying to put some distance between the two of you to increase their interest.
Whatever the reason, you might need some help on how to ignore someone you love, as it’s not so easy and straightforward…
Why You Would Ignore Someone You Love
At first thought, you might think that ignoring someone you love would come from a place of negativity and pain, as you would likely ignore someone when they have hurt you. It can be seen as passive-aggressive.
However, ignoring someone you love is usually done to try and get their attention. Talking about things over and over again obviously didn’t work, so the next thing you want to try is ignoring them to make them realize that they have hurt you.
Ignoring them might get their attention and give them the space they need, to realize what they have done. Hopefully, it will put things into perspective for them.
Note: Before you start ignoring someone, I recommend truly talking it out. Nothing beats communication in a healthy relationship.
Now, if it’s someone who you aren’t dating yet, then it might help to snap them out of their comfort zone. To show them you won’t be waiting around forever and that they do actually want and need you in their life.
When ignoring someone you love, just make sure that you don’t take it too far. If it turns into a toxic situation, it would be best to decide whether or not the relationship is actually right for you.
How To Ignore Someone You Love
Here are some tips on how to ignore someone you love. Plus, how to do it in an effective way, and not let it be destructive.
Stand Your Ground
When you decide to ignore someone you love, then you need to stand your ground. It can be really difficult trying to ignore someone who you have strong feelings for, but you have to stick to your guns and go through with it.
Just keep your goal in mind, whether it is giving them the space needed to realize what they have done wrong or to create a stronger bond between the two of you by helping them understand how important you are to them.
When it feels like you can’t keep ignoring them anymore, just remind yourself why you started. What you are wanting to achieve with it, and hopefully, it should give you the motivation to go on.
Use Silent Treatment
Living with someone makes it quite difficult to ignore them, and you can’t really avoid them much when you share a bed.
In this case, the best way to ignore someone is to use the silent treatment and literally go radio silent on your partner to get the point across.
Don’t start up a chat, keep conversations short, and try to make it known that you are giving each other space.
When they try to speak to you, and you can’t be completely silent, you can reply with short, precise answers and not engage anymore. This way, you are not being completely rude, but you are also not just giving in straight away.
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Actions Speak Louder Than Words
Ignoring someone by not speaking to them is one way to get your point across, but sometimes actions speak louder than words. Going out of your way to ignore your partner through your actions might be a more effective method.
There are many different ways to do this. You could cook yourself dinner and leave them out of it, preparing food only for yourself.
Or cook something you like that you know they don’t like.
You could only clean up your items in the house or only do your laundry. Put your show on TV without asking what they want to watch, or go to bed without telling them.
These are all effective ways to show that you are not happy and that they need to do some thinking, and hopefully some apologizing, in order to get things back to normal.
Is this petty? Honestly, a little bit. Does it work? Truly depends.
But if you’re over having the same argument, let your actions speak for themselves.
Focus On Your Life
The best thing you can do to ignore someone is to focus on your own life. So often in relationships, we forget who we are and lose our independence.
What better time for you to get this back?
Do things that you love doing. Pick up a new hobby, join a new sports group, hang out with your other friends again!
Pretty much just spend the time doing things that make you happy, and not doing anything to please anyone else.
By doing this, not only will you be gaining your own independence and building on your life, but the person you love will see how happy you can be without them.
Hopefully, it will encourage them to try and fix things between the two of you. And f it doesn’t, you are building the foundation for your life without them once more.
Don’t Text Back Too Quickly
It will take some restraint on your part, but you need to slow down how quickly you respond to them when they text you.
You might want to respond straight away to a flirty text or a question, but leave some time to reply, to make them think about you a little more.
When you take a while to reply, it shows that you have other things on and that they aren’t the center of your universe.
This will cause them to wait on you, rather than things being the other way around.
It will also make them anticipate your response more, rather than them just taking it for granted.
You need to show that you are not there waiting for them to text or for them to summon you, and you have things going on in your own life, and you will fit them in when you can.
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In most cases, ignoring someone for a few hours is not going to do anything, they might not even notice that you were ignoring them to begin with.
To make it truly effective, you have to be patient. Your effort will pay off eventually if you practice patience and make it known that you will be sticking to your plan until it does pay off.
This might become even more difficult if your partner or crush decides to give you a taste of your own medicine, and they turn around and ignore you back, but this just means that you have to be even more patient and wait it out.
It will pay off being the one who lasts the longest, and you will definitely get your point across, and let them know how serious you are, by not giving in before they do.
Avoid Being Rude
Ignoring someone is technically being rude to them, but simple silence doesn’t have to be rude. Seriously! You can ignore them respectfully without making the situation worse.
Even though you might seem stoic on the outside, inside you might be experiencing a rollercoaster of emotions, feeling a deep desire to talk to them one moment, and the next feeling really angry at them for what they have done or how they might have let you down.
It can be really difficult dealing with all these emotions, especially when the person you would normally speak to about this is the one you are ignoring.
However, as much as these emotions might overwhelm you, you have to avoid being rude to your partner.
Being rude to them, on top of ignoring them, will only make things much worse. It will make you feel bad in the end and it will not create a clean slate for the two of you to begin speaking when you do decide to talk.
By acting neutral and not rude, you will allow an open conversation without too much emotion to happen once you have gotten your point across.
Make Yourself Look Busy
When ignoring someone, you don’t want to be sitting on the couch all day looking bored! This doesn’t really help the situation at all.
Instead, it is really important for both yourself and your cause to not only make yourself look busy, but to busy up your time so you don’t sit there wallowing in the situation.
Make plans of your own, meet up with friends, and let them know that you will have to schedule them in, instead of you being open and readily available all the time to suit their whims.
This might even mean seeing them for a date one night of the week, but then not making a plan to meet up for a week or two after that.
Being busy will keep them on their toes and make them realize that they need to earn your time, instead of just expecting it.
This is a great time to focus on your career goals and make time for yourself. Don’t just stay thinking about them all day.
Keep your mind and body busy.
However, don’t make yourself seem too busy, as this could come across as you trying too hard or putting on an act, and all your actions will seem to be based on them.
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Do Not Visit The Places They Do
If the two of you frequent the same places, such as a coffee shop or library, for the love of God! Avoid these places while you are ignoring them.
“Running into them” at the places you both frequent will definitely put a bump in your plans, and the chances of you having to talk to them and interact will be quite high.
Plus it’ll look orchestrated.
Choose another coffee shop to visit for a while, or just adjust your times and plans to not run into them often if you can.
This should only be temporary, but it will definitely get you out of sticky situations, and you hopefully won’t be forced into conversations with them.
If you do happen to run into them, just give a polite hello, or whatever seems appropriate, and carry on. Don’t be rude, but let your feelings be known without saying much at all.
Keep t cool, calm, and collected.
Make Your Intentions Known
This can be tricky to do, but you need to let your intentions known without spending too much time talking or paying attention to the person you love.
They need to know that you are not ignoring them just for the sake of ignoring them, but there is a reason behind it. You have set intentions as to why you are doing it and have to stay strong.
You will not be talking to them openly because you are trying to ignore them, but you still need to show that you are open to talking again once they have had the time to realize what they have done.
When they are ready to speak openly or to move forward they can approach you.
So as hard as it might be, show interest through your actions, but don’t give away too much that you end up not ignoring them and there is no point to the plan.
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Follow Your Gut
Without speaking and interacting with your partner, you will have to trust your gut and go with your intuition.
One of the worst things you can do in life is not trusting and following your gut.
You will know when the time is right to ignore the person you love, to create some space between the two of you to figure things out, and you will have to trust your instincts when it is time to talk to them again, once you have had enough space and time apart.
You will also need to pick up on any signs that ignoring your partner is not actually working and when it is not an effective way to get through to them.
If this is the case, trust your intuition, and change your approach. Everyone responds differently to situations, and ignoring your partner might not be effective for your relationship and to fix things going forward.
If it doesn’t feel right, then take a step back and reevaluate.
Don’t Engage Online
For many of us, a lot of our interactions happen online and through social media. Everythng is online nowadays.
When you are ignoring someone, then this needs to be another place you extend your efforts to.
There is no point in ignoring them in person, only to go and like their posts or send them memes.
Also don’t post passive-aggressive comments or retweets. Those AREN’T effective.
Engaging online causes confucon and it does not help you seem like you are serious about what you are trying to achieve.
If you find it really difficult not to engage online, then either delete the social media apps from your phone in the meantime or hide their posts from your feed.
You could also use social media to your advantage, by posting photos of yourself keeping busy and enjoying life, and just carrying on as normal. This shows that you are fine without them and that they need to make an effort to be in your life, not just assume that they deserve to be there.
Make Use Of The Space
One of the reasons you might be ignoring someone you love is to give them space to think about how they have acted and to think about how they might have hurt you.
During this time, you should take the opportunity to think things through yourself as well. Consider the situation and what has happened, and how it has made you feel. Did you have a role to play in it? Do you think it’s something that you can fix? Is it worth even trying?
You likely need the space just as much as they do to try and think things through with a clear head and without them interjecting their opinion every five minutes.
When To Stop Ignoring The Person You Love
It can be really difficult to ignore the person you love, but you might feel as though it is the only option you have in certain situations.
Ignoring them could be okay at first, but after some time, it might become really difficult and you would be dying to speak to them again and get things back to normal.
The issue is that you can’t give in too early, and you will have to pick your time perfectly to speak to them again.
You will be the only one who will know when the time is right to open up the conversation, whether it is when your partner genuinely apologizes or when you feel as though carrying on will have no point.
Sometimes, just getting space and giving them enough time to think things through is a good way to remedy the situation.
Some people don’t apologize with their words, but with actions. And demanding an apology when they’re already showing you they’re sorry will only hurt your relationship in the long-run.
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How To Talk After Ignoring The Person You Love
When it comes time to talk to your partner after ignoring them, you need to make sure you approach the conversation with a level head, and from a place of love, rather than negativity or resentment.
If you feel as though you won’t be able to talk to them without becoming angry or arguing, you should wait a little longer to control your emotions.
Youmay feel lonely for a couple of days but it’s better than having a huge blowout and making matters worse. Spend time thinking about what you want and make room in your life for that change.
Make sure that the two of you can sit down in a safe environment where both of you feel comfortable, and where you will be able to address any issues without a heated argument.
Hopefully, the time spent not talking would have given you both a good perspective on the relationship and how to move forward.
Be careful not to damage your relationship trying to be right and making a big deal out of a minor inconvenience.
Ignoring someone should only be done when you (or your partner) need space and clarity and the distance will give you that.
Overall, when figuring out how to ignore someone you love, remember that you truly LOVE them. Don’t be hurtful or malicious.
But do take care of your own mental health and wellbeing.