It is one thing moving on from someone you have dated, you’ve had your chance together and it just didn’t work out, which can sometimes make moving on easy.
When it comes to moving on from someone you have never dated, it can be really tough. You might not have those years of memories and love built up, but there are just so many “what-ifs”, and the story never played itself out before it was cut short.
The idea of being heartbroken over someone you never dated is not addressed often enough, but it can be so difficult to go through.
If you find yourself in the position where a love story you thought was going to play out has suddenly ended before it even got anywhere, you might be looking for help to move on.
You need to decide to take the first step to move on, and when you are at that stage, you can start doing things to help heal. Keep reading for how to move on from someone you never dated, to build yourself back up again.
Getting Over Someone You Never Dated
Getting over someone you never even dated can come with a whole host of new challenges and emotions, especially because it might feel as though your emotions are not acknowledged or even felt by the other person.
Here are some ways you can get over someone who you never dated:
The first step is to stop fantasizing about the person you need to move on from. Stop thinking of the life you might have had together, or what dating them might have been like.
We all have a bad habit of only imagining the best of situations, and ignoring what the negatives might be. While fantasizing like this can be fun at times, it can be so detrimental doing so when you should be moving on.
You are only putting yourself through the hurt again, and breaking your heart over and over when you think of what could have been.
Do your best to get them out of your mind, and be realistic about the fact that not everything is roses, and fantasizing about this person can only hurt you more.
Stop Trying To Win Them Over
When someone has made it clear that they need you to move on, and that they are not interested in a relationship, you need to stop pushing to get them back.
Whether this means that you need to stop texting them or flirting when you see each other, you need to respect that they don’t want anything more, or that not having a relationship might be what is best for both of you.
Rather call it quits with your dignity intact, and respect how they feel about the relationship.
Do Something For Yourself
The best way to move on from someone is to focus on yourself. Do something that makes you happy and which allows you to focus on yourself.
Pamper yourself, start a new hobby, get a new haircut – do something different and fun which takes your mind off of them and puts you on the right track to becoming more independent in yourself.
Be spontaneous and do not overthink things, it might turn out to be a really fun experience that helps you see that there is more to life than thinking of what might have been.
Doing something for yourself helps to take your mind off of him, and gives you a good space to start moving on and healing.
Validate Your Feelings
Being heartbroken over someone you did not even date can be a rollercoaster ride. It is almost expected that you just move on without feeling hurt and upset, but you need to listen to how you feel and know that your feelings are valid.
Don’t just push your feelings aside and try to ignore them, just because it wasn’t a ‘real’ heartbreak. As hard as it might be, you need to embrace your emotions.
Embracing and going through your emotions also means that you need to understand that it will take time to heal and that you need to give yourself time to move on. It will not happen overnight.
Give yourself time to grieve the very real loss that you have gone through, which will only help you heal better over time.
In times of need and hurt, it really helps to have a support system. Look to others who can help support you and give you the advice to move on if needed.
For some people, this could come in the form of family or friends, but if you feel like they might not be able to help, then you could look to online support groups. Surrounding yourself with people who care can help save you from falling into a dark place on your own.
Share the load with people you trust, and let them support you. It is okay to ask for help and support, and really is a great way to remind yourself that there are people around you who care.
Avoid Social Media
We are all guilty of looking up an ex or a love interest on social media, and while this is okay at times and can be a great source of information, it is something that you need to avoid when moving on!
If the two of you never dated, it means that they might move on quicker, and checking up on them on social media might just bring you more hurt that you do not need.
Don’t go search them up, don’t look through their stories, and don’t try to keep track of what they are doing. This will get you absolutely nowhere other than holding you back while you watch them move on with their lives.
Keeping busy is key to moving on! Would you rather join a social group or hobby club and keep busy and distracted having fun, or sit at home feeling down?
While you do need to give yourself time to move on, you also need to keep busy and distracted.
Find things that you enjoy and explore them. Join a sports group, spend more time with friends and try to keep your mind off of them. Over time, it will become natural and you won’t find yourself thinking of them all the time.
Understand It Isn’t All You
When two people do not end up dating after having chemistry together, it often isn’t just one person who needs to take the blame.
Not everyone you have feelings for will be the one for you, and you will need to go a little easy on yourself.
Yes, you might have done something that has caused the two of you to not date, but it could also just be that the two of you are not compatible. Do not blame yourself outright and be too hard on yourself, and do things to remind yourself how great you are.
You are a great catch for the right person, and building up your confidence again puts you in a great space to find the right person for you, and to be in a healthy, happy relationship.
Don’t Revisit Old Conversations
Chances are that you have your old texts saved on your phone, and while it might be tempting to go back and re-read all of these, you need to avoid it.
Your relationship never came to be, and it is for good reason. It is easy enough to happily text someone 24/7, but there would have been reasons the two of you didn’t end up dating, and you need to remember that.
Reading through old conversations between the two of you won’t bring back any love or feelings, and will only leave you hurt and upset.
Make A List Of What You Want
Writing down your intentions and wants can help you manifest them. Write down what you want to achieve over the next few months or years, and even write down what you want in an ideal partner.
This gives you a good direction to work towards and helps you realize what it is that you really want. By being honest with yourself and writing down what you want your ideal partner to be, you might see it wasn’t the person you are getting over, and it also gives you a good idea of the person you need to be in a relationship.
Moving On From Someone You Never Dated
It can feel so tough getting over someone you never dated, especially because not everyone sees it as a valid or serious heartbreak.
The best way to move on is to focus on yourself and not focus on what might have been. The relationship didn’t happen for a reason and you cannot dwell on this.
Do things you enjoy, find positive people to surround yourself with, work through your emotions, and give yourself time to move on. It will get easier!
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