21 Signs An Older Man Is Falling In Love With You
Dating an older man is definitely very different from dating someone your age or younger.
They have likely been through more when it comes to relationships and dating. Most of the time, they will have a more mature outlook on life.
A mature man and a younger woman can be a great pair, especially since women reportedly mature faster than men.
If you have started to spend time with an older guy and feel a bit out of your element, trust me, I get it.
If you have been seeing an older man, you might be wondering how to tell whether he is falling in love with you or if he’s just casually dating.
You might be developing stronger feelings for him, but before you take the next step, you would want to make sure that he feels the same way.
I have compiled all the signs to look for that an older man is falling in love with you based on completely anecdotal, unscientific evidence.
This is just what I have found from asking a lot of women who have dated older men, plus my own past relationships.
I personally tend to date the same age or a little older but have dated someone with an age difference of 15 years.
So whether you are physically attracted to older men or just found yourself falling for this one guy, I have done some of my best diggings to compile a complete list.
Signs An Older Man Is Falling In Love With You
He’s Open About It
Older men don’t want to play games and don’t want to waste too much time either, so there is a good chance that if he is falling in love with you, he will make it quite obvious.
He could even just tell you outright and clear the air eventually, or he would change the way he acts, change his lifestyle, and other things to show that you are an important part of his life.
As he is older, there is a good chance that he is looking for someone to settle down with. Unless he’s a forever bachelor of course.
But if he thinks that this is you, then he will not waste too much time beating around the bush and would be looking forward to letting you know how he feels so you could settle down sooner.
However, there might be some other factors holding him back from telling you outright, so luckily there are some other signs to look out for.
He Is Always Trying To Help You
An older man will want to provide for you, even if it is not financially. He will want to feel as though he can take care of you and be there for you when he is falling in love with you, both because he cares for you, and he wants to prove that he can provide.
Because of this, he will try to help you whenever he can. He would go out of his way to help you, even when you do not ask for it. This could be picking you up dinner on the way home, helping you fix something at home, or just asking what you need.
This makes him feel valued and useful, and he would be hoping that you would take notice of this and hopefully see him as a caring, potential partner.
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He Asks About Your Relationship Status
If the two of you have been seeing each other or going on dates, then he will likely know whether you are single or also seeing other people, but he might ask you what you want in the future and whether or not you are looking to settle down.
As he starts to fall in love with you, he would envision a future together, and he would want to start building a more stable relationship between the two of you. However, he wouldn’t want to ask you yet if he doesn’t know what you want.
So, if an older guy starts asking about your relationship status, or whether or not you are ready to date, then it is a good sign that he is falling in love with you and seeing a future together.
He Buys You Things
You should never think that someone buying you gifts is the only sign you need that they love you, but for some people, gift-giving is their love language, and as an older man, he would likely have the means to spoil you when he feels like it.
This doesn’t mean he has to buy you expensive jewelry or perfume, but it could be thoughtful gifts that show he cares and that he has been thinking about you.
By following his love language of gift-giving, he is showing you that he feels comfortable communicating his feelings towards you this way and that you are on his mind often.
He Speaks About His Future And His Wealth
An older man knows the importance of being financially stable, and when he goes into a relationship with someone new, financial stability would be something for him to consider, not something he plans on achieving later on.
Because of this, he would likely want to prove to you that he is financially stable and that he has the means to provide for you and possibly a family.
One way he would show this is by talking about his wealth, investments, and more, and his future plans to grow his wealth.
He would want you to know that he is secure and stable and that he is able to provide for you. This is driven by his feelings for you and his wanting to build a future with you.
He Compliments You Often
A man who is falling in love with you would not be able to resist complimenting you, and this would be genuine compliments on more than just your looks. He would compliment who you are as a person and your strengths.
An older man will also likely have the confidence to compliment you in person, and won’t rely on text to do it either. When he does compliment you, you will notice that he is being genuine.
Just keep in mind that if he is only complimenting you on your looks and outward beauty, it might not be the best sign that he is falling in love with you, but rather is wanting to get something from you.
He Is Happy Around You
If a man is falling in love with you, even if he is older, then he will be happy around you, and there is no hiding it.
He would be constantly smiling and laughing, and will just be obviously enjoying being in your presence. You would catch him glancing at you, and his body language would be directed toward you too.
When you are around someone you are physically and emotionally attracted to, then you are going to be happy when you are around them, and this can be hard to hide.
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He Keeps In Contact With You
He might be busy with his career and other things, but he would make an effort to keep in contact with you. He would message you throughout the day, and call you when he can.
He might not be able to speak all day every day, but he will definitely get in touch with you the moment he can, and ask you how you’ve been and want to catch up.
He will not leave you on read or ghost you for a few days, because he is falling in love with you and he wants you to know that he is always there for you and that you are a priority in his life.
He Talks About Your Future Together
If the two of you have been seeing each other for some time, but have not had any serious conversations, he might show that he is falling in love with you by talking about your future together.
He won’t want to waste time if there is no need to, and he will start telling you what he would want to achieve together with you, and ask whether you feel the same.
As an older man, he would want to start planning the rest of his life, and he would ask you whether or not you would want to be a part of it all.
He Makes Time For You
Being older, he might have quite a busy schedule, whether this is at work or even with children he has from a past relationship.
This means that he does not have too much spare time on his hands, but if he is falling in love with you, then he will do his best to make time.
He will move his schedule around to see you more often, and he will try his best to create some spare time for the two of you to be together.
His time is valuable to him, and giving you his time, and going through the effort of finding time for you, shows how much you mean to him.
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He Listens To You
It can be so rare finding someone to actually listen to you. Many people pretend to listen, but they don’t actually pay attention to what you are saying.
If an older man is falling in love with you, then you would notice that he listens to you, and remembers what it is that you say. This also allows him to get to know you better, which is something that he would want to do.
He picks up on the smaller details, and never interrupts you while you talk. Whether you are rambling on about your day or talking about something more serious, he is always there to listen to you and give you the time and attention you need.
He Makes Sacrifices For You
It is rare to find a partner who has the same values, morals, and habits as you, and you would both need to make sacrifices and compromises to work together as a couple.
A good sign that he is falling in love with you is if he is willing to make certain sacrifices to fit into your life better, and to make him a better partner for you overall.
This could be eating less meat if you are on a vegan or vegetarian diet, or not smoking around you, or quitting altogether.
These sacrifices show that he is willing to make serious and long-term changes for you because he obviously sees you as a partner who he can spend the rest of his life with.
He Opens Up About His Past
It is likely that he has been married before, or in several other relationships, and if he is serious about you and your relationship, then he will probably open up to you about these past relationships.
You probably won’t want to know all the little details, but he might share why the relationships ended, and how he handled this.
This is all his way of letting you in and allowing you to know him as a person, and a partner, better, and showing you that he is willing to open up to you.
This will also give you a good idea of what he is like as a partner, and what a possible relationship with him would be like too.
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He Wants To Meet Your Friends And Family
Sometimes the best way to get to know someone is to meet the most important people in their life. He would know this, so when he is falling in love with you, he would want to meet the people that mean the most to you.
He would ask to meet your friends, and then eventually your family. Even though he is older, he would still want their approval, and he would want them to know that he is a serious feature in your life.
While he might not be looking for as much approval from friends and families as a younger man might, it would still be important for him to meet them, to better be involved in your life, and for you to know that he is serious too.
He Introduces You To His Family And Friends
As important as it would be for him to meet your family and friends, he would want to introduce you to the most important people in his life too.
He might be slightly nervous about dating someone younger, but he would be making a statement by introducing you to family and friends, showing that he is serious about you and he sees you as someone who will be around for quite some time.
He might also be looking for approval from his friends and family, just for that added peace of mind that you are the right person for him, and that they would accept you.
He is showing you that he doesn’t see you as a momentary fling and that he does want you to be around for longer, as a serious partner.
He Is Only Seeing You
Many people keep their options open when dating around, but a sign that he is serious about you, and he is falling in love with you, is when he stops seeing other people, and he only spends time with you.
He might have been playing the field first, but the feelings he is developing for you make him want to be more committed to you, and he doesn’t want to mess this up by seeing other people.
There is no backup plan for him because you are the only one he wants to be with, and he will commit all of his time and attention to you.
He Tries New Things For You
As an older man, he would likely be set in his ways, with his habits, likes, and his dislikes too. He won’t want to step out of his comfort zone if he doesn’t have to.
However, if he is falling in love with you, he would be more willing to do things he wouldn’t normally do or wouldn’t feel comfortable doing.
There might also be things that you prefer doing because you are younger, and he will be willing to try these out just to make you happy.
He will go out of his way, and escape his comfort zone, to show you that the two of you can work together well and that he is willing to integrate into your lifestyle.
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He Supports You
As an older man, he knows what it takes to be successful and what it takes to achieve your dreams, and when he is falling in love with you, he will want to support you on your path.
He encourages you with work or studies, and he will do what he can to help you on the way. He is your biggest supporter when you achieve certain things, and he fully accepts your dreams and choices.
He would give you emotional support, but he might even be willing to offer financial support as well while you try to study further or work towards a goal.
He Is Affectionate
Affection plays a huge role in a relationship, and if his physical affection is more than just sexual, then it shows that there are deeper feelings there and that he is ready to commit to you on a deeper level.
He would make the effort, or it would just come naturally, for him to be more affectionate with you. He would hold your hand, stroke your hair, and more, and he will be more affectionate with his words as well.
As he falls more in love with you, he would be driven to be more affectionate with you, and this will be quite apparent.
He Is Protective Of You
When a man falls in love with someone, he will feel protective of them, and this is especially true for older men.
He will develop a strong desire to protect the person he is falling in love with, and he will do what he can to make you feel safe and protected while you are around him.
As an older man, he will also likely do this in a warmer, calmer way, rather than acting violent or temperamental to try and show you how strong he can be.
It is important for him that he knows that he can keep you safe, and the instinct just becomes stronger the more he falls in love with you.
The ‘Hero Instinct’
A lot of men have what’s called a ‘hero instinct.’ This is a psychological concept that describes many men’s deep desire to protect, provide, and be a hero for the people they care about.
This can look different from person to person. It can be actually physically protecting you from danger, providing for and protecting your family, or just being a leader in some capacity (like at work.)
Some people believe this is deeply rooted in a man’s biology as they have (traditionally) played the role of protectors and providers.
Okay. Great. What does this have to do with older men? I’m getting there…
Although most men are believed to have this natural drive, a lot of young men aren’t as financially stable or able to be that ‘hero.’
The ‘hero instinct’ tends to show up more prominently in older men. They are (normally) more established and love seducing younger women by protecting them.
A woman their own age may be more independent and not interested in a ‘hero.’
Younger women may activate the hero instinct more in older men, making them feel more needed and valued.
So take note if you notice him ‘stepping up’ more, protecting, providing, and making double the effort of men half his age.
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Do Older Guys Fall In Love Faster?
Some people think that older guys fall in love faster than their younger counterparts.
This is both true and not true! Like all things in life, there’s layers to this.
It really does depend on the guy and where he is at in his life, as well as what he has been through in past relationships.
There really is no clear answer here. I know, I hate living in the grey as well.
But you will have to look at the specific guy and relationship to determine whether or not he is someone that would fall in love faster.
Why Older Guys DO Fall In Love Faster
Some older guys do fall in love faster and there is a good reason for this. They have been through it all already. All being marriage, possibly children, buying a home, and more.
This means that he doesn’t want to waste much time dating and building up a relationship slowly.
He knows what he wants and he is working to get it sooner rather than later. He would be able to identify the person he wants to be with easily and he doesn’t want to waste his time or yours.
For this reason, it would seem that he falls in love quicker, but he really is just cutting out all the other steps and doubts that come with settling down.
He has the experience to know what he wants and he will therefore fall in love faster than men half his age!
Why Older Guys DON’T Fall In Love Faster
The same argument can be made that men do not fall in love faster than younger guys, and once again, this will depend on him and what he has been through.
Younger guys might be in a rush to find someone and settle down quickly, so they seem to fall in love faster to get this all done.
However, an older man would have done all of this, and he might just be looking for a partner to spend his time with, without having to worry about marriage, children, and buying a home together.
If he has been through a nasty divorce, he may be even slower than most in settling down and finding love again.
He would likely take his time to get to know someone better, and there would be no rush to lock things down.
He would simply be enjoying their company and making sure that their lives fit together well, and that the age gap would not be a problem further down the line.
Make sure to spend quality time with the guy you’re dating and see where he falls on the spectrum.
He may be looking for a healthy relationship and no stress, or he could have been burnt in the past and not looking to develop true feelings for anyone anytime soon.
Casual dating may just be what this type of guy is looking for, and that’s perfectly fine as long as you’re both on the same page.
Now, whether you like younger men or older guy, at the end of the day, most men fall in love the same across the board.
An older man will have more experience and likely be more skilled in wooing you, perhaps even know what he wants better.
But the signs of a man in love tend to be pretty universal.
They will generally make time for you, prioritize you, and show love depending on their love language (a whole ‘nother topic)
If you start developing romantic feelings for an older man (unless he’s a married man,) you shouldn’t get too in your head about it.
If he’s treating you right and there’s chemistry, don’t worry too much about the age difference and do what’s best for you. Some people may judge, especially if there’s a rather large difference, but if you’re happy and satisfied, do what every confident woman does and focus on yourself.
Life experiences have taught me enough times that you can’t please everyone so you may as well make yourself happy first.