We have all been in this situation before. A guy is very flirty and forward in person but then he doesn’t text you at all.
In fact, you don’t hear from him. Maybe he hasn’t even asked you for your number! What does this mean? And more importantly, what can you do?!
He Acts Like He Likes Me In Person But Never Texts Me
I don’t believe texting is a big indicator of whether or not someone truly likes you. We all have different texting styles.
Some people text a lot, some not at all, and some prefer a phone call. Everyone has a very different relationship with their phone.
So a guy acting flirty in person and not being a big texter isn’t a big deal in theory BUT….
And this is a big BUT…
A guy who is into you will go out of his way to spend more time with you.
So, let’s say he’s not texting you at all.
Is he asking you out?
Is he trying to see you more often?
When you see each other in person, does he initiate plans?
These are the true signs that a man likes you.
Anything else is just wishy-washy and not worth reading into.
But there are situations that can be more complicated. Nothing in life is black and white.
So let’s get into some possible reasons he acts like he likes you but never texts…..
He’s Just A Flirt
Some people (men and woman alike) just love to flirt. it’s second nature for them and completely innocent.
He could just be a major flirt and not really that into you.
Luckily, this is an easy one to figure out.
Watch him (in a non-creepy way) and see how he is with everyone else.
Is he casual and polite with other woman? Or is he forward and flirty with them as well?
You can even ask a good friend for their unbiased opinion.
I honestly once thought a guy was VERY into me and after talking to a couple of my girlfriends realized he was just a major flirt (or maybe a player?)
Point is, if he acts this way with everyone it isn’t something to read into. Flirt back if you want and have fun, but don’t get upset that he isn’t texting you. He’s simply not reading into it as much as you are and that is okay. NEXT!
He’s A Bad Texter
I touched on this briefly before, but yes, maybe he’s just a poor texter.
Some people, and I’ll include myself here, don’t like texting all day. I use it for very brief interactions and to make plans but I don’t have entire text-conversations going on everyday of the week.
A lot of men are like this too. They’ll text to make plans or send a meme but don’t really have entire dialogues via iMessaage.
So this isn’t a big deal really.
But like I mentioned, what else is he doing outside of not texting? If he’s not texting you, not asking you out, and not making plans with you, you should NOT be thinking about him so much.
Time to clear out your brain space for a man who actually makes the effort to be with you.
He’s Just Busy
I should clump this one with bad texter. A lot of bad texters are just really busy people who don’t have a lot of extra time to spend on their phones.
But like I said above (twice now), I don’t care how busy this guy is, you need to be judging him by the effort (or lack thereof) that he’s putting into the relationship with you.
Listen, we’re all busy. Many of us have jobs (some multiple), friends, family, volunteer-work, all the things. We’re all juggling too much.
But that’s no excuse to not make the time for the things and people you care about.
And it’s like I said in this post, maybe he is the most busy man in the world. Maybe he runs a company, is working on his MBA, and volunteers with at-risk youth on weekends.
So where does that leave you?
Dating, or wanting to date, a man who has no time to spend or make for you? Are you okay with seeing him once every two weeks?
Again, I’ll say this until I’m blue in the face, prioritize people who prioritize you!
Can A Guy Like You And Not Text You?
Yes, of course. A guy can definitely like you and not text you. But liking and valuing someone are two different things.
He can like you and not want to date you.
He can like you and still be playing the field.
Or, as my favorite cliche of all time, he can like you but he’s not that into you.
I believe it was chapter one of He’s Just Not That Into You that states he’s not that into you if he’s not calling.
Nowadays texting is the new calling (although I still prefer men to call, consider me old school.) And if he’s not texting you, even if just a quick hello, it’s likely he’s just not that into you.
Check out this related post on: How Often Should A Guy Text In The Beginning
One Caveat.. What’s The Environment?
Okay, here’s one caveat to all of this…
Where is he acting flirty? Is he a mutual friend you see once a week at a bar-b-q?
Or is this someone you see everyday at school and/or work?
This is a little important because someone you’re seeing at work 8 hours a day, 5 days a week might not want to come on too strong and text you after work as well.
They may figure ‘I’ll talk to her tomorrow again!”
But if it’s a mutual friend you see every one or two weeks at Happy Hour or a college game, then that’s completely different. he’s choosing to go a whole week (or more) without seeing or speaking to you.
That would raise some alarms for me because it shows me he’s okay not being an active part of my life.
He doesn’t think to check up on me and he’s not actively trying to see me.
So take some time and evaluate your unique situation and TRUST YOUR GUT.
I don’t know your situation personally, but I have no time or energy for inconsistent men.
If a guy is acting like he likes me in person but I don’t hear from him for a week (or at all), I just don’t have the mental energy or time to deal with him.
He obviously doesn’t know what he wants, and that’s perfectly fine. But I know what I want and it’s consistency.
I hope, hope, hoooooope you do as well. Because you deserve someone that values you and makes you feel appreciated and seen every day of the week, not just that one hour during Happy Hour drinks.
But like I said as well, every situation is different and unique and you’ll have to trust your gut instinct.
Just know, anyone who truly wants you, won’t have you questioning it.