This has got to be one of the most devastating feelings ever. You’re hurting, have been lying in bed crying for days, and suddenly you find out the news. Your ex hooked up with someone else.
After all the time you gave them, after everything you’ve sacrificed, they just move on like you never even mattered. And that feeling can seem unbearable.
But it’s not. You will move on, be better than ever before and find someone who deserves you. And here’s how you do that.
What To Do When Your Ex ‘Moves On’ Quickly
Focus On Yourself
After all that crying, you’re all bloated, puffy and your self-care has probably gone out the window. If you’re already in rough shape, get out of bed and clean up.
Take some time, have a bubble bath, and relax.
Pamper yourself and take care of your mental health. Put on your favorite TV show, prepare a nice meal and have some “me time.”
Put on some actual clothes instead of pajamas and fill up your time with useful activities.
And for the love of God, get off social media! Especially if you have your ex on social media or compulsively check their page, you need a break.
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Get Your Ex Out Of Your Head
Instead of dwelling on the past, focus on your future.
Stop thinking about your ex, who they’re with, what they’re doing. Instead, focus on what you want to do next.
Do you want to be alone and focus on your career?
Do you want to find someone new? Whatever you do, don’t try to get your ex back. After they’ve slept with someone so soon, it’s clear they never cared enough.
You shouldn’t wait around for someone like that. They don’t deserve you.
Understand Your Value
Being betrayed like that can make everyone feel worthless.
Questions like “why weren’t I good enough” might start roaming through your brain. Don’t let doubt swallow you.
Understand that this was your ex’s mistake, their betrayal, and it had nothing to do with you. You are valuable, you are enough.
Reflect on that and try to see just how valuable you are. In this situation, you are the victim.
Don’t blame yourself for the mistakes other people made.
Boost Your Confidence
These situations are bound to make you lose confidence.
So, you need to work on getting it back. One of the best tricks in the book is getting a makeover. Cut your hair, change your clothes, go to a spa.
Freshening your appearance will make you see yourself in a different light and can give you the boost you need. Maybe start working out and eating better.
This will make you feel better, which will reflect on the outside. Find some hobbies to entertain you. The better you feel on the inside, the more confident you will be.
And the more confident you are, the easier it will be to see that your ex is not worth it.
In this period, you’ve probably neglected your friends and social interaction in general.
A breakup, followed by the pain of your ex sleeping with someone else so soon, can make you avoid society. But that’s to your detriment.
You’re only hurting yourself by staying in the house. So, you’ve got to get out there again.
You’ve got to reconnect with your friends again. Don’t make the mistake of losing all your relationships because of what your ex has done.
Text your friends, invite them out and have fun again. Or, if a night out is not your taste, have a night in. Board games, movies, food, all that jazz.
Focus On Your Career
If your thoughts aren’t giving you peace, you need to fill your time with something else you care about.
Concentrating all your strength into your career might be the best way to handle everything. You’re bettering your life while keeping your mind occupied.
A promotion, opening your own business, whatever career advancement you want will bring you immense joy. This will counterbalance the pain you feel.
And, if you need to show your ex that you’re over him, focusing on your well-being is the best revenge.
Improve Your Mental Health
There’s only so much you can do on your own.
Sometimes, asking for help is the best course of action. Counseling can work wonders if you feel lost.
Mental health is just as important as physical health. If you break your leg, you wouldn’t just shrug it off.
You’d go to a hospital. You’d let a professional take a look and fix it. So, it only makes sense you’d do the same for your mental health.
Going to counseling is always a good thing, and it’s especially helpful when you’re going through something. A professional will know how to guide you through tough times.
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Take A Trip
In situations like this, being in your hometown can make you feel even worse. Risking seeing your ex, especially if they’re with someone new, can be a setback in your healing process.
If you need an escape, taking a trip somewhere can be your best bet. Grab some friends, get in a van, and take a road trip.
If that’s not to your liking, try a city break. Do you want some sun? Try an island, maybe the Maldives.
Or if you’re more of a mountain person, maybe try skiing. Whatever you might choose, the trip will give you the time to process everything in a safe space.
Get Back Into The Dating Scene
Maybe what you need is to find some fresh love. To feel that excitement, those butterflies again.
Putting yourself out there again will give your love life meaning again. It will no longer be about your ex, but about the new people you meet.
Not only is dating fun, but it allows you to meet valuable people. And who knows, you might meet the love of your life.
I know some people say to take time before starting to date again, and if you need that time, that’s completely valid.
But just putting yourself out there will help you see just how many options there really are.
Sometimes we can be very blinded and think our ex is the ‘one and only.’ They are not. There’s so many fish in the sea.
So, even if you don’t want to jump into a romantic relationship. just yet, keep your eyes open so you don’t go down the negativity loop of ‘never finding someone else.’
Have Some Fun
Your ex isn’t the only one who can sleep with someone new after your breakup. You can have some fun of your own.
Go clubbing, dance, have fun and hook up with someone if you want. A rebound works wonders for some people.
If that’s not your vibe, that’s fine. You don’t have to do it. But if you want to, go for it!
Just make sue you’re doing things for the right reasons. Don’t find yourself a rebound to ‘get even’ as you will likely feel worse in the end.
Just remember, you, just like your ex, are completely free to do what you please.
Rediscover what you love to do. Take this time as a period of introspection and make time for YOU.
However that may look like.
Remember, being single can be extremely fun and liberating. Enjoy the freedom and rediscover your passions and who you were without your other half.
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