10 Selfish Signs He’s Just Another Asshole

Love can sometimes blind us to the less savory traits of our partners, especially when we’re caught up in the heady buzz of a new romance.

But what if Mr. Right is actually Mr. Right-for-Himself?

Before you dive deeper, let’s run through eight big red flags that suggest your beau might just be a selfish sweetheart.

Get ready, because some of these might hit close to home!

He Dominates Every Conversation

Picture this: you’re sharing a quiet moment, but instead of a dialogue, it feels like a monologue.

He’s so wrapped up in his own stories and problems that finding space for your words feels like a battle.

Every time you start to share something about your day, he swiftly shifts the focus back to himself, often with a tale that tops yours.

This constant need to outshine you in conversation doesn’t just drown out your voice—it makes it nearly impossible for you to feel truly heard and valued in the relationship.

This kind of one-upmanship is exhausting and can leave you feeling sidelined in your own relationship. A true partner should celebrate your stories, not consistently compete with them.

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He’s a Credit Hog

Does your partner always take the spotlight, even when you’ve worked on something together? If every project ends with him singing his own praises and leaving your contributions in the dark, that’s a red flag.

It’s not cool when someone makes it all about them, especially when you should be celebrating together!

When you share an accomplishment, it should feel like a joint celebration, not a solo performance by him.

If he consistently overlooks your efforts and hoards the limelight, it suggests a lack of appreciation and respect for you as an equal partner.

Remember, a relationship is about lifting each other up, not climbing over one another to get to the top.

If he can’t share the stage with you, it might be time to find someone who will cheer for your successes as loudly as they do for their own.

He’s Selfish in Intimate Moments

In a relationship, intimacy should be about mutual satisfaction, not just one partner’s pleasure.

If he seems indifferent to your needs in the bedroom, only engaging when it suits him, this is a clear sign of selfish behavior. His lack of concern for your fulfillment is not only unfair but also indicative of a larger pattern of self-centeredness.

This kind of disregard can spill over into other areas of your relationship, affecting how you connect on emotional and physical levels.

Ask yourself if this is the kind of partnership you want, where one person’s needs are consistently prioritized over the other’s.

Read Next: 8 Red Flags of Emotional Manipulation to Watch Out For

Your Needs Are ‘Convenient’

Think about the last time he did something nice for you. Was it because he genuinely cared, or did he have something to gain?

A partner who only remembers your likes and dislikes when it suits them isn’t really looking out for you. True love means caring all the time, not just when it’s convenient.

If his acts of kindness feel like transactions, where each gesture comes with strings attached or expectations of something in return, it undermines the sincerity of the relationship.

Love should be selfless, not a strategy to keep score or leverage favors. Look for a partner who cares for you freely and consistently, without an agenda.

He Gatekeeps His Hobbies

Ever get excited about joining him for a game or a hobby and suddenly, there’s a million reasons you shouldn’t? If he keeps his favorite activities locked away as if they’re top-secret missions, ask yourself why.

Sharing should be part of the fun in a relationship! When he excludes you consistently, it may reflect a broader issue of control or unwillingness to integrate lives fully.

Healthy relationships thrive on mutual participation and enjoyment in each other’s interests. If he’s not eager to include you, it could be a sign that he’s not fully investing in the partnership the way he should.

Zero Patience for Your Stories

When it’s his turn to talk, the stories flow like a river, but as soon as you start speaking, does he glance at his phone or interrupt?

If listening to your day feels like a chore to him, that’s not a good sign. Everyone deserves a partner who listens, really listens.

A partner who truly values you will show interest in even the small details of your life. If he can’t be bothered to engage with your experiences and feelings, it may indicate a lack of respect and empathy in the relationship.

True connection requires attention and care, not just when it’s convenient, but all the time.

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He Plans Without You

How often do you find out about plans at the last second? If he’s always making decisions without your input, that’s pretty selfish.

Relationships are about teamwork, and that includes planning your fun times together, not just following along with his agenda.

It’s crucial that both partners have a say in what you do together. This shows respect and consideration for each other’s preferences and schedules.

If you’re often left out of the planning process, it might be time to reassess how well your needs are being respected in the relationship.

True partnership means building a life together, not just being an accessory to someone else’s plans.

Selective Listener

Does he remember only the things that matter to him? Like, he knows the exact time his favorite show starts but forgets your birthday or work achievements?

Being selective with what he chooses to listen to is a classic sign of selfish behavior. This selective memory can really hurt, especially when it comes to the moments and milestones that are important to you.

A caring partner makes an effort to remember and celebrate your successes and special days because they matter to you, and thus, should matter to them too. If he only tunes in when it benefits him, it’s a clear signal that his priorities might be skewed away from a healthy, balanced relationship.

Constant Competition

It feels like everything is a contest with him, doesn’t it? If your achievements suddenly turn into a battle of who did it better, that’s draining.

You’re supposed to be on the same team, supporting each other, not competing.

A relationship should be a safe space where you both celebrate each other’s victories, not a battleground for one-upmanship.

When every accomplishment becomes a competition, it not only saps the joy out of your successes but also creates an environment of constant tension.

Cooperation, not competition, is the foundation of any strong and loving partnership.

Read Next: 15 Signs He Is Hurting After The Break Up (DON’T BE FOOLED!)

Apology Averse

Lastly, think about the last time he apologized to you. Can’t remember? If saying sorry seems to be the hardest word for him, even when he’s clearly wrong, that’s a major issue. Everyone makes mistakes, but owning up to them is key to a healthy relationship.

A partner who refuses to apologize can create a dynamic where issues are unresolved and feelings are unacknowledged. This reluctance to admit faults isn’t just about pride; it’s about respect.

Being able to apologize shows maturity and care for the relationship’s wellbeing. If apologies are rare, it might be a sign that the relationship lacks the necessary foundation of mutual respect and understanding.

Being aware of these signs can help you understand your relationship better.

Remember, you deserve someone who treats you with respect and kindness, not just when it benefits them.

Keep an eye out for these behaviors, and don’t settle for a partner who is selfishly in love with themselves more than they are with you!