Do you feel like your boyfriend is always angry at you? Does he get mad at you even when you feel like you have done nothing wrong?
You are not alone. Many women experience the same thing, and it can really do a number on you and your mental health, having you doubt whether you are the problem or not.
The first thing you should know is that it is not normal for your partner to be mad or annoyed with you all the time. This is not healthy behavior, and it is something that you both need to work on, or it is something you need to walk away from.
You should not have to put up with being his emotional punching bag, especially when you are not actually doing anything.
For yourself, you need to figure out why this is happening, and if there is anything that can be done to stop this pattern of behavior.
Is It Normal Behavior?
It is so important to understand that feeling as though you are always making your boyfriend mad is really not normal behavior.
It is not normal for one partner to be constantly angry at the other. Do not accept this as love.
Take a look at your relationship from the outside. If there are any signs that you might be in an abusive relationship, you should find someone safe to talk to.
This could be a friend or family member, or an organization in your local community.
Finding support and a way to stay safe helps immensely to get out of an abusive relationship.
However, if your boyfriend does not display any abusive tendencies, and has not always acted this way, there might be something else going on that you are not aware of.
There could be added stresses or frustrations in his life that are causing him to act out with you.
Once again, this is not behavior that needs to be accepted, but it is worth getting to the root of the problem.
What To Do When Your Boyfriend Is Always Mad
Here are some things to do if you notice that your boyfriend is always mad at you. Take things slow and try to think things through before making any moves or actions.
Find Out Why He Is Mad
It is really worth finding out why your boyfriend might always be mad with you. There could be other issues happening in his life that you aren’t aware of, and he might be most comfortable taking his frustrations out on you (even though this is not acceptable behavior)
If your partner is getting mad at you for the smallest reasons, and for seemingly insignificant things, then something is seriously wrong.
The best thing you can do is sit him down to talk to him. You need to have an open conversation about how his actions are affecting you, and try to get him to open up about why he is acting this way.
It might be that he does not realize how his actions are hurting you, and by sitting down and talking to him about this, it might make him realize how harsh his actions and words have been, and it could help him open up about what has caused him to act like this.
Being able to talk to him, and hopefully him obliging, is much healthier than worrying about why he is acting that way, and dealing with the unfair behavior too.
If you feel as though you cannot sit down and talk to each other about serious issues like this, then it could be a sign that your relationship is not a healthy, long-lasting one.
Work Through Existing Issues
Partners who have been in a relationship for a long time tend to get comfortable with each other, and communication can begin to dwindle.
Past issues might seem to be settled, but they can sit and bubble over time, and the smallest thing can bring back the emotions that these issues once held.
There could be trust issues in the relationship, or he might feel overworked. Whatever it is, an issue such as this could be causing him to feel anger and resentment towards you, which might present itself as anger for everything that you do.
Once again, sitting down and talking about any issues that could be causing this frustration might help you work through it all, and hopefully through the issues holding you back.
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Have You Done Anything?
It is never okay for your boyfriend to be mad with you for everything. You should sit him down and talk to him about this to see if there are any issues on his side, but you should also consider if you have changed anything in the relationship.
Maybe you have taken on a new hobby, are spending more time at work, or are focused on something else that is taking attention away from your relationship. He might be finding this difficult to handle and might be frustrated that you are not spending as much time with him as you usually do.
While this does not call for him to be annoyed with you for everything, he might not actually know how to express his feelings towards you. You would have to push him to bring up why he is acting this way.
This could see him bringing up any issues that he has at the moment, and while it could be difficult to work through, it is the only way to resolve any negative feelings between the two of you.
How To Know When The Relationship Is Toxic
There could be situations where your boyfriend is angry with you because of outside issues which could be affecting your relationship.
However, if this is not the issue, and you feel as though his behavior is not warranted, you need to recognize the signs that your relationship might be toxic.
Toxic relationships never work out, and the sooner you recognize one, the easier it will be to remove yourself from the situation. These are some signs to look for:
He Never Apologizes
A sign that he does not care about your feelings or your relationship is that he does not apologize for his behavior. He does not see him getting angry at you for every small thing to be a problem, and he will never admit that it is not normal behavior.
He will go as far as retelling the story a different way to make it seem like it was not his fault at all, and this way he has nothing to apologize about.
In a relationship, both parties need to accept fault to move forward, and if he simply refuses to do this, and avoids apologizing at all costs, it is time to move on.
He Gaslights You
Gaslighting is when he will try to put the blame on you, even when you did absolutely nothing wrong in the situation.
This shows as him getting mad at you for every little thing, and even for when you have done nothing wrong, and when you approach him with this issue, he turns it around and blames it all on you.
He will not accept fault and he will do his best to turn the situation around to make you seem like the bad person. This goes hand in hand with him never apologizing, as he turns the story upside down to put the blame on you, and in that way, he can justify never apologizing.
It can be so difficult to work through this and to even recognize when he is gaslighting you, as it can break you down over time to the point of where you think you are at fault and he is justified with getting angry with you.
He Exaggerates Situations
He would turn the smallest insignificance into a huge problem all the time. You may have left a dish on the counter, which in itself is such a non-occurrence, but to him, he could treat it as though you have left the kitchen to dirt and despair.
Him exaggerating situations gives him the fuel he needs to justify being angry at you all of the time. He will create problems just so that he can take his anger out on you. It can be so confusing to see the truth for what it is in a situation, but take a step back and try to think about how other people would react.
You Are Not An Emotional Punching Bag
Partners in a relationship are there to support each other through difficult times.
This however does not mean that he can take all of his frustrations out on you, and you don’t deserve to be subject to his anger whenever he feels like he needs to vent.
Remember that this behavior is not normal, and he either needs to sit down with you to discuss why he is acting this way, and how he will control himself going forward, or you need to remember your self-worth and walk away from the toxic relationship.
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