Being in a conversation with a dry texter is exhausting and boring at the same time! Trying to keep the conversation going, especially when the other person is putting no effort in, really isn’t fun.
Not only do you not want to be in a conversation with a dry texter, but you might also want to avoid being a dry texter yourself!
If you are nervous about chatting to someone new and special, and you don’t want to come across as uninterested or boring, but you aren’t quite sure how, we have you covered!
Keep reading for all the tips you need on how not to be a dry texter, and how to show you are interested through text, and how to keep that someone special engaged…
How To Not Be A Dry Texter
Text Them First
You do not have to wait for them to send the first text! Sending the first text shows that you want to be talking to them and that you were thinking of them. They might even be quite anxious about sending the first text, so it could be a great relief for them when you do.
Your text could be about anything, saying good morning, asking them what their plans are for the day, or even just commenting on something you have seen or heard.
Make sure to have a good energy with the first text, to help encourage the conversation to keep going, and just to let them know that you are happy to be talking to them.
Just keep in mind though that you should give them the opportunity to text first once in a while, and you can’t be the only one putting in the effort to get talking.
Send Longer Texts
Whether you are replying to a text or sending a message to start a conversation, put in a little bit of effort to make the text longer than one word.
You might want to say hello, but a “hi” or “hey” isn’t very engaging, and you should follow it up with a little bit more.
Start with a hello and then follow with a question. If they have asked you something, avoid a simple yes or no answer, and think of something else to say in the message.
One-word messages, or messages with a few words, are not good enough if you are trying to not be a dry texter, and it might take a little bit of effort, but it will be worth it!
Don’t Be Too Vague
Your messages you send should not be so vague that they do not know how to reply. Avoid the usual messages of “wyd?” or “what’s up?”, as these are boring to read and boring to reply to.
Instead, opt for a more direct and specific message and question that would actually encourage them to reply with matching energy. Try something like “hey, please tell me I am not the only one who is battling to get out of bed this morning?”
Whatever it might be, word your message in such a way that they actually want to reply to you, and don’t feel like replying to you is just a chore they need to tick off for the day.
Bring Up Personal Details
This will depend on how well you both know each other and how long you have been chatting for, but it really helps to bring up personal details in the conversation.
Try to remember something they have mentioned to you, whether it be their favorite movie or something coming up at work. Ask them about it and check-in to see how they are doing.
Not only will they appreciate the care and time you have taken to ask about it, but they will also know that you listen to them and pay attention to what they say and the things they care about.
Bringing personal details into your conversations is a great way to take the relationship a little further, and a great way to get to know each other a little bit more as well.
Don’t Leave Them On Read
We all have things that distract us during the day, but you need to do your best to not ignore their messages, and then possibly forget to reply at all.
This doesn’t mean you should be glued to your phone 24/7, and you need to work out a balance that is perfect for your life, but you should at least reply to their messages as soon as you can.
If you are busy with something that will prevent you from actively taking part in the conversation, then you need to let them know that you will catch up with them later on.
Another gesture that goes a long way is if you let them know why you have taken a while to reply. You don’t have to grovel and make a huge deal out of it, but simply tell them that you were caught up at work or with friends.
Give The Conversation The Attention It Deserves
When talking to someone over text, you should try to give them the same amount of attention that you would give to someone if you were talking to them in person.
Texting does offer a quicker, more impersonal way of chatting, but when you are talking to someone special, you do not want it to be impersonal.
Respond to them with the same enthusiasm and the same type of energy that you would if you were chatting in real life, and don’t respond with bland, boring messages.
Emojis are there to be used, and you should definitely throw in an emoji or two when texting! They help convey your message a little bit more, and they make the message a little more fun to read as well.
This doesn’t mean you should overload your texts with emojis, as that could be really difficult to read, and it might come across as slightly immature, but you should add some relevant emojis to make the message more lively and to put your thoughts across a little more.
Watch Your Tone
One of the biggest problems with texting is that you cannot fully send your tone through a message, and a message that you think is positive, might be received as being slightly bland or even negative.
You need to be mindful of the tone of your messages and how it might be perceived. Reread your messages before you send them, and add in a “lol” or an emoji if you feel your tone is not coming across correctly.
Everyone loves a good GIF, so make use of them! A well-timed, relevant GIF can really be great in a conversation and sometimes helps you say the things that you can’t put into words.
Now you need to remember that you cannot rely on GIFs alone, as they can be difficult to reply to and can run the conversation dry. Instead use a GIF to back up something you have said, or to add more oomph to your conversation!
Most texting apps allow you to search for relevant GIFs, so you will be able to find the perfect one to send!
Make Use Of Open-Ended Questions
Above, we recommended that you ask specific questions, but sometimes it can also help to ask open-ended questions. These can be a great way to start a conversation when you don’t know each other that well just yet, and they are a good way to learn more about one another.
Some questions include:
- If you could travel anywhere, where would you go right now?
- What songs do you listen to when you need a pick-me-up?
- What are your fun party tricks?
An interesting question is an ideal way to kick off the conversation when it has died down a little bit.
Don’t Be Scared To Joke Around
Humor is always a winner, and throwing some humor into your conversation is a sure way to not let it turn dry.
Even if you are afraid to tell a joke or make a funny comment, go out on a limb and see how it goes. A well-timed dad joke might just be what makes their day!
They will appreciate the effort you have taken to make them laugh or smile, especially if it has been a tough day for them, and it might just make them feel comfortable to joke back with you.
Ask Their Opinion
One thing we all have in common is that we love to give our opinion, so a great way to avoid the conversation going dry is to ask them their opinion on something.
What you ask their opinion on will depend on your relationship, whether you ask them for an opinion on a new song, the best pizza topping, or even diving deeper and asking something political.
A simple question about their opinion can really open up the conversation further and get the two of you talking about more.
Throw In Some Flirting
If there is something special between the two of you, and there is potential to take things further, then you could muster up some courage to add some flirtiness to your texts.
Start off small, telling them that something you saw during the day made you think of them, see how they react, and then work your way up from there.
If they respond with some flirtation of their own, then it gives you a little more of an idea of how they feel about you, and you can ramp up the flirting going forward!
Open Up About Yourself
It is natural to be cautious and guarded when talking to someone new, but if the two of you have been chatting for some time and you want to take the conversation to the next level before it dries out, then you could try to open up and tell them something about yourself.
This doesn’t have to be anything huge or your deepest darkest secret, but it could even just be a hobby you enjoy or your favorite place you like to go to when you need some space.
Showing them that you are willing to open up about yourself might encourage them to do the same, and this is a sure way to keep your conversation going.
Let them know that you want to do more than just keep texting by trying to initiate plans. Ask if the two of you can hang out or if you can go bowling one evening.
It might make you feel a little anxious, and there is always the chance that they flake out, but starting out with someone new takes a giant leap of faith, and if you do not put yourself out there then you will never know where it might lead!
Drop A Random Fact
If you cannot think of anything to say but you are desperate to keep the conversation going, you can drop a random fact that you think they might find interesting!
This could be absolutely anything, whether you give them a fact about your favorite animal or how the moon affects the tides, but it might just pique their interest and get them chatting back with you.
This might even lead to a more personal conversation between the two of you which will keep the conversation going and prevent it from turning dry!
How To Not Be A Dry Texter
Being a fun and engaging texter is not something that comes naturally to everyone, and even though you might be really interested in the other person, it could take some effort for you to keep up an enthusiastic, interesting conversation.
If this is the case, then read through all the above tips on how to not be a dry texter, how you can keep the conversation alive, and how to make yourself seem like the interesting person that you are!
No matter the tips you use, just remember to be yourself and make sure that the effort is coming from both sides.